Christmas 2010
The kids slept in fairly late. It must be part of growing up, they’re a little more level-headed about the presents. Which is not to say they’re “normal.” We kept a strange little ritual Rachel started years ago. Everybody had to open their presents while wearing oven mitts. A present is opened, and the mitts are passed. Apparently it’s a side-effect of Rachel’s artist mentality. However it occurred, it’s now bizarre family tradition.

A few days ago Rachel observed there were more presents for Joshua than there were for her. It was any easy enough problem to solve. I got the chocoholic a few boxes of chocolates. She can probably self-medicate for a few weeks now. Unless her Mom finds an open box. There can be tension with two chocoholics in the house.

Joshua had asked me if I could speed up the graphics on his computer. When he plays his favorite historical game the display sometimes slowed to a crawl or froze up because the onboard graphics weren’t good enough for gaming. He got a Sapphire Radeon 5770 graphics card, and because it uses more power, he got a bigger power supply too. I told him he would install it, and I’d help him. He said, “You’re the coolest Dad ever.”

After the presents were opened he brought his computer to the kitchen table and he got a little computer hardware education. He took the case off and I had him examine the different power connectors and where they were attached. He removed the power supply, disconnected it from the hardware, installed the new supply and got everything re-connected.

Then we installed the new video card. It was a pretty cool-looking card with a big fan on it. It’s also capable of handling a couple monitors at a time. All that capability requires two slots instead of one. I showed Joshua how to break out an access panel and he broke out the second. Then he inserted the card and hooked up the power cable. After putting the case back on he took it back to his room and hooked everything back up.

I was a little apprehensive because I’d forgotten to disable the on-board graphics before doing the installation. I didn’t expect a hardware conflict, but things happen. It booted up fine. Then he installed the video card drivers and everything was still fine. Joshua started his game and it looked pretty good. He could quickly tell the difference. Satisfied with our efforts, I left him to his game.

For the rest of the day I got updates of how it was doing. He’d come to me smiling and say how he’d increased the frame rate or detail level and it was still smooth. Eventually he was at the maximum settings and it was still working beautifully.

He’d shown me before how he’d click on an area to change the view and it would take a long time for the view to display. Now he could scroll around and it was like a movie camera. It’s a pretty impressive change. When he’s playing his game now he can barely conceal a smile. He’s a happy boy.

Eventually Rachel got him away from his computer and they played with their new iPod Touches. They broadcast video back and forth like the giddy teenagers they can be. It was a Christmas of memorable good times.

Patricia told me later that she’d heard Joshua tell his friend Ryan that it was his best Christmas ever. It was his Dad’s best Christmas too.

http://publicserf.blogspot.comWhine at me: publicserf@yahoo.com-

This morning Rachel informed me the door to the garage wasn't working right. I tried the handle and it wouldn’t budge. It was jammed alright. We need to use that door several times a day so I took the lockset out.

We then went to Wal-Mart to pick up a prescription and some other stuff. Leaving the door unfastened wouldn't work since Gimlet could get in the garage, and then escape when the garage door is raised. What to do, what to do? I took a bungee cord, stuck an end through the lockset hole to catch the door, and fastened the other end far enough away to hold it secure. Tacky, but it worked.

Our first stop was Home Depot. One of our CFL bulbs had burned out, and they're difficult to dispose of because they contain mercury. Home Depot has bins to get rid of them. The HazMat team that picks them up must not come around very often, the bin was full. Slackers. They’re kindred spirits doing the jobs illegal aliens don't want to do.

While we were there I picked up a new Schlage lockset to replace the broken one. Getting the same brand as the broken one seemed a reasonable way to avoid potential problems with fit. After a quick checkout we were on our way to Wal-Mart.

When we were at Wal-Mart I started to back away from some shelving and Rachel pushed me forward. As suspected, a lady was pushing a cart behind me. The lady said, "I was afraid I was going to hit him." Rachel turned to me and dryly observed, "See Dad, you scare people."

After wandering the expansive wilderness of Super Wal-Mart we were ready for an early lunch. It'd been too long since I'd had flame-broiled goodness so I suggested Burger Tyrant. Rachel was agreeable, so away we went to dine on the food of kings.

Rachel asked why I bend my fries in half. I pointed out that I only bend the longer ones, the shorter ones I eat in groups. The reason is because the adjoining surfaces promote capillary action, resulting in a higher ketchup/fry ratio.

This knowledge apparently inspired her to wax philosophical. She opined that she loves French fries, everybody she knows loves French fries. “Maybe that’s because they’re hand-crafted in small batches.” I’m a little embarrassed to admit I’d never seen what now seemed so glaringly obvious.

After burgers I was ready for pie and coffee. Rachel said she wasn't interested. I got my coffee and apple pie. I also got a slice of chocolate pie for Rachel. I set the pie on the table and Rachel insisted she didn't want any. In mere minutes she changed her mind, "If I don't eat it here I'll eat it at home." Proving once again that pie is never wasted, and women can't resist chocolate.

When we got home and pulled into the garage she started laughing. I asked why. She explained, "A door held closed with a bungee cord is so redneck." Yeah, it kinda is. Or you could think of it as "homey" or "quaint." "Charming" or "whimsical" would work too. "Bucolic" might be a stretch. But "redneck"? Where did that come from? We don't even own a pickup.

The lockset package said, "Lifetime Warranty" so I called Schlage to see what they had to say about our broken one. I explained that I’d taken it out of the door, the levers worked fine, but the bolt only depressed about an eighth of an inch. The woman I talked to said they call the bolt a latch, it was broken, and she'd send me a new one. I told her what Rachel said about the bungee cord appearing redneck. She laughed, and thanked me for being an enjoyable customer. It's another service.

Cold air would continue coming through the hole in the door so a decision had to be made. Stuff it with a sponge or sock? No, that would only look more redneck. The lockset was put back in without the latch. The hole is sealed, and the levers make a fine holder for the bungee cord. Now we have to take the new lockset back to Home Depot. It just never ends. It’s too cold for sweat equity.

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Christmas 2010

It's been a year of notable changes, some significant, some not so much, some surprising, some not so much.

Rachel was valedictorian of her high school class. That wasn't surprising since she had a 4.0 average. What was surprising was her speech. It was perhaps the first valedictory speech that stressed the need to own a dog. For weeks afterward people approached us in public places and raved about her speech. It was surreal. We spent the summer at home, but took a trip to... the Twilight Zone.

After being courted by several colleges, Rachel chose to go to Ashford. Getting a full scholarship and being able to come home every day to her pup, Gimlet, was more than she could resist. We're happy with her decision, she's a joy to have around.

We had a bar-mitzvah-ish celebration for Joshua at church. That was Patricia's idea. She can be wondrously creative.

Not pausing to savor his new status, Joshua has continued his own scholarly 4.0 achievements. He joined the Junior High marching band. He still takes piano and tennis lessons. He's still growing like a weed. Where does he find the time?

Patricia continues her illustrious medical career as a school nurse. She also teaches Sunday School.

I continue my life as a slacker retiree. It's the only thing I've ever excelled at.

We got a 24' swimming pool this summer. Perhaps it was only a coincidence, the town decided to replace its water tower with two new ones. Considering there was a crew here to prepare the ground for the pool and install it, and the city then put up two water towers, we did more to stimulate the economy than the government's $1 trillion stimulous. You're welcome.

Merry Christmas!

Written 8/10/10
It was, I think, about five years ago that the brain tumor re-grew to where it affected my right eye. That was an affect so obvious that it was impossible to miss. That was the only problem I knew of, but it wasn’t the only one. I remember helping somebody at the office, and 10 minutes later he returned for something else. I didn’t recognize him, and I asked him to show me an ID. He was incredulous and insisted he’d just been there, but I would have sworn I’d never seen him before in my life. Steve, the guard, confirmed he’d just been there. And I seemed to have another problem.
After the last surgery the right eye was blind, and the other half-blind- big, obvious change. Work became a major struggle and it couldn’t be tied to vision problems. I had some testing done by a psychiatrist. The intelligence test wasn’t a problem, I still tested Mensa-smart for problem solving. However, and it was a big however, my memory was damaged. The tumor pressure that made my right eye point at my nose by damaging cranial nerves had also been damaging the nearby memory-controlling area too. Remembering new faces is now almost impossible for me. I can look at somebody, look away, and have no idea what the person looked like. It makes for awkward, uncomfortable moments, but humility is a good thing.
I slowly realized that the memory problem had actually been going on for years. I’d thought that I was so used to official rules that learning new ones was difficult- old dogs and all that. But I couldn’t see what was right in front of me. Gone was the ability to watch a training tape one time and have it down cold. I had to watch one 2-3 times to get anything. This is not conducive to job performance when there are dozens of rule and procedure changes per week. I hate to think how much grief I caused my kind bosses.
You might think, “Wow, that’s sad, even pathetic, but why are you sharing this misery?” Hopefully, I can tie things together.
At the heart of any sin is selfishness, and if we look at our lives we see a lot of it. What drives selfishness is vanity. Everybody is sure they deserve what they want, and that anybody who offends them deserves what they get. In my own experience, the vanity of self-righteousness is the hardest sin to deal with. It’s too easy to be angry and resentful after being hurt. I’ve always considered myself an incurable romantic. It drives me nuts that I haven’t even been kissed in over two years. That fact causes me to feel unwanted, unloved, and unneeded. To say the least, the rage has a bit of a pre-occupation for years.
In that self-righteous rage I had no idea how much I’d lost. I was a little too obsessed with internal monologues that ended with variations of, “You can’t treat me this way, I waited for you, I don’t deserve to be treated this way, someday you’re going to answer to God for this! You little goat!” See, rage, you could tell. Being unhappy 24/7, I’d quite forgotten I’d ever been happy. When I looked at my old blog and started reading, I could hardly believe I’d ever been so happy.
It’s never been a particularly warm and loving marriage, but the kids have been a joy. In my self-obsession I’d quite forgotten that. It’s hard to be self-righteous after the realization I’ve wasted years that should have been golden. In my selfishness I deprived myself. Had I not been so blind, I would have seen I was over-reacting. Had I kept writing I would have reviewed and remembered the good times and felt gratitude and love. Forgiveness would be easier.
Selfishness is a monster waste of time; it separates us from a loving relationship with God. God hardly needs to punish us; we cause enough pain to those around us and ourselves. Self-righteousness may be the hardest sin to give up, but forgiving ourselves is even harder.

Whine at me: publicserf@yahoo.com-
I haven't posted in ages due to... turbulent times, and I got out of the habit. I'm going to try to get back in the habit by posting something, anything, with some regularity. My Sunday School class teacher is gone this Sunday, and he asked me to teach. Here's the lesson plan I adapted from the Teacher's Guide.

Sunday School 8-8-10, 2 Samuel 7:1-7, 11-16, 18-21 Focus On God’s Purposes
Step 1
Learner Guide Pg 118-119 Dwight L. Moody changed his focus from money to God’s will. Know of anybody who’s done that?
Step 2
Read 2 Samuel 7:1-7 2Sa 7:1 Now when the king lived in his house and the LORD had given him rest from all his surrounding enemies, 2 the king said to Nathan the prophet, "See now, I dwell in a house of cedar, but the ark of God dwells in a tent." 3 And Nathan said to the king, "Go, do all that is in your heart, for the LORD is with you."
4 But that same night the word of the LORD came to Nathan, 5 "Go and tell my servant David, 'Thus says the LORD: Would you build me a house to dwell in? 6 I have not lived in a house since the day I brought up the people of Israel from Egypt to this day, but I have been moving about in a tent for my dwelling. 7 In all places where I have moved with all the people of Israel, did I speak a word with any of the judges of Israel, whom I commanded to shepherd my people Israel, saying, "Why have you not built me a house of cedar?"'

V1-2 David rested in a time of peace. He decided that if he lived in a palace surely God deserved something better than a tent. He came up with a plan to build a temple of cedar. When we are at rest, do we consider how we can serve God? The Ark was already in Jerusalem, and the Jews wouldn’t be wandering anymore.

V3 Why did Nathan approve? We aren’t told why. Perhaps because David was the anointed King, and God had shown His favor with his victories. Perhaps it just seemed right for God to have a grand temple too. He was speaking as a god man, not as a prophet. We should desire to go forward with good works.
Are we too willing to go forward with plans based only on the approval of others? Where did David and Nathan fail? There is no mention that David or Nathan consulted God. Good intentions weren’t enough to perform His will.
What value is there in seeking the advice of others? Cautions? Is there anything our class could do to honor the Lord?
God says if he wanted a grand temple He would have asked for one, a humble tent was fine. So too, Christ was content to dwell in flesh before ascending.
John 5:19 The Son can do nothing on his own initiative, but only what he sees the Father doing
Step 3
Read V11b-16 11b Moreover, the LORD declares to you that the LORD will make you a house. 12 When your days are fulfilled and you lie down with your fathers, I will raise up your offspring after you, who shall come from your body, and I will establish his kingdom. 13 He shall build a house for my name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever. 14 I will be to him a father, and he shall be to me a son. When he commits iniquity, I will discipline him with the rod of men, with the stripes of the sons of men, 15 but my steadfast love will not depart from him, as I took it from Saul, whom I put away from before you. 16 And your house and your kingdom shall be made sure forever before me. Your throne shall be established forever.'"
God was not angry that David wanted to build a temple. In return for David’s good intention to honor Him, God honors him. David’s intentions for a gift to God were honored with a greater gift. God’s plan was much bigger than David’s. Quite a contrast, David wanted to build God a house, God declares he’ll build David a house that will endure forever. David was the first King of Israel to have his son succeed him. Right before him, Saul’s whole family was wiped out.
David received nothing from this covenant immediately, except the joy of his faith in His promise.
But David got to prepare the materials for his son to build the temple. In 1 Chronicles 22:8 God explained that David had too much blood on his hands. His son, a child of peace would build the temple, fulfilling the promise in the near-term, later the Prince of Peace, would bring the eternal temple.
Mt 26:61 And said, This fellow said, I am able to destroy the temple of God, and to build it in three days.
John 2:19 Jesus answered and said unto them, Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up.

What guidelines do you use to decide if something is God’s will, Bible study, prayer?
How do we relate to God’s covenant with David? Does it make a difference in our lives?
Step 4
V14-15 As the covenant is for David’s son, Solomon, and descendants, it is also later for Christ’s spiritual children. The promises of chastening and eternal love are ours.
Heb 12:6 For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.
To be successful we must turn our good intentions over to His will. God intentions are better than good intentions.
Know of anybody who changed their intentions due to God’s will?

Read V18-21 18 Then King David went in and sat before the LORD and said, "Who am I, O Lord GOD, and what is my house, that you have brought me thus far? 19 And yet this was a small thing in your eyes, O Lord GOD. You have spoken also of your servant's house for a great while to come, and this is instruction for mankind, O Lord GOD!
20 And what more can David say to you? For you know your servant, O Lord GOD! 21 Because of your promise, and according to your own heart, you have brought about all this greatness, to make your servant know it.
What was David’s response to the covenant? Went in, sat down, talked with God in humility, acknowledged His leadership, expressed confidence in His promise and asked Him to fulfill it, praised God, confessed to being His servant. Do we do this? When? We too, need to claim God’s promises and ask Him to fulfill them.

Rachel was nervous at the prospect of giving a Valedictorian speech. Her only guideline was that it be under two minutes. Thinking I could help, I wrote a draft to give her some ideas, or she could change it to suit her. This is what I came up with:
We are gathered to celebrate a milestone in our lives. With much gratitude we thank supportive parents, and teachers whose patience wore thin, but not out, and who encouraged us even when they might have been themselves discouraged.
In the past four years we’ve grown together, learned to drive, gotten our first MP3 players and cell phones, gotten first jobs, and taken the first baby steps of independence. We look forward to lives filled with promise, with big steps like college, careers, marriage, and our own children.
Our lives are shaped by our experiences, and our parents and teachers have had major parts in many of them. They’ve affected us. They have enriched us with knowledge and led by example. They have tried to prepare us for our journeys. Our lives are unique, we blaze our own trails, but we have their paths before us for guides. We can rejoice in our youth, but as we blaze our trails we too shall grow older and those following us shall someday see our burning candles as guides
We may eventually forget much of what has happened between these brick walls, but there will be moments we remember, examples that are like rock in the foundations of our lives. We will remember displays of courage, integrity, patience, kindness, self-control and understanding.
Let us go forth and live lives full of moments like that. Let us make a difference in the lives of those around us, and those that follow.
Every dark cloud has its silver lining, and silver clouds can have dark ones. We can rejoice with each other now, knowing that we won’t see some of those classmates again. But no matter what happens in our lives there will be some things we will always have, some things we will always know. We will have the love of our families, and we will always know we are members of the Camanche Class of 2010.
Despite her apprehension, she had too much integrity to work off of somebody else. Her result was as unique as she is:
I second what they said. I don't have much to say that everyone else hasn't already said in this graduation or countless others. But what I do have, I'll keep brief because I realize that the ultimate goal of this day is to graduate before getting heat stroke. Nobody will remember this speech in any number of days. So I will take the liberty of saying any dorky thing that comes to mind.
First off, I would like to thank everyone and their dogs for putting up with me for the last 5 years, and if you don't have a dog you should probably get one. Having allergies is no excuse; you can find a hypoallergenic dog. Either way, a dog should definitely be in your future.
But I digress. To get back to the subject of graduation, I'd like to tell you a story about how this day reminds me of Noah’s ark. The graduates entered the auditorium 2 by 2 like the animals entered the ark, not that I'm calling us graduates livestock or anything of the sort, though we may be perceived as such by the government. I know this analogy isn’t perfect, but you must admit it comes pretty close. The animals arrived to be saved from the impending flood, but what is it we are being saved from? You can have your own interpretation, but some common answers may include: homework, teachers, or just high school in general. After the flood, the animals emerged into their new environment, like we will burst forth from the bowels of Hades into the blinding new world of college or the workforce. But that's where the similarities end, or do they?
Okay, this time I'll really get back on track. To finish up this speech, I'd like to say that high school is a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there.